If you are having doubts about the emotional stability and health of your relationship, then you have probably landed here for a reason. One of the ways that an emotional vampire gets under your skin is by tricking you into believing that everything is your fault, and that if you would just change, then the relationship would be perfect.
They will not take responsibility for their role as the emotional vampire, drainer or abuser. They may also convince you that you are crazy or wrong for thinking these things, and you might truly begin to wonder if you are.
1. Begin Preparations to Leave –
You know what you need to do, so now is the time to begin taking the steps. Your partner has taken away your power, and now is the time to take it back.
Begin to make plans from this place of power, not from a place of fear. If you live together, start to gather information on where you can stay.
Can you stay with your family, friends or someone you trust?
2. Put a Stop to Insults –
One of the first things to do is to let your partner know that you are open to healthy suggestions about the relationship, but that you will no longer tolerate, blaming or name calling.
They are responsible for their behaviors, not you.
There’s never a justifiable reason to continually name call someone you love.
One of the things that emotionally manipulative people love to do is to take away your control. Remember how you were in control of your life before this relationship. Begin to take back that control.
If you share money, start a plan to take back what you own. Gather your items and everything you’d need to be able to leave comfortably.
If your partner gets angry easily, make sure you have friends and family near by to help you.
4. Renew Friendships –
Reach out to your friends and family whom have already expressed concern. Tell them that you realize what they are trying to point out, and that you are actively taking steps of of leaving your relationship.
Let them know that this is a decision and action that you must make on your own, and that you also need their support and possibly active help from them.
Let your partner know that these are things that you will not give up, and that you will not tolerate them making comments or putting you down about these activities.
5. Get Your Ducks in a Row, Then Go –
After you have done the above steps and you feel that you at least have a financial cushion, somewhere safe to go, and you have a support system, then leave. You can also leave a letter to your partner explaining why you are leaving. Let them know that you tried, but their behavior in the relationship has been causing you stress and it’s time for you to move on. Explain what they have done if you feel the need; let them know how they hurt you so they might be able to fix it in the future.
Remember your dreams, and get ready to begin achieving your goals again. Get counseling if you feel the need and use your support systems as much as you can. When you are ready to begin dating again, you will know the signs to look for if anyone begins to display the traits of your ex, then you can end things right then and there.
Remember this experience as a lesson you learned. You can go forth in the future knowing exactly what you want in a partner and how you want to be treated. You always deserve the best.
About The Author:
Alex J. Stevenson does blogging here http://